The icy patch on the sidewalk leered at us. Dark, dangerous, and sinister, it lurked, waiting for unwary pedestrians. Its smooth, thick surface sneered at us, daring us to try and break it. My daughter and I sneered back. But how would we confront this slippery menace? Metal shovel? Jackhammer? Blowtorch?Hardly.
With a steely stare, I pulled a salt shaker out of my pocket, and began to scatter the tiny grains over the cold, hard surface. Immediately, we heard the sound of the salt going to work. My daughter dipped her head close to the sidewalk and exclaimed, “Dad, it’s crackling!” She kept staring down, expecting something visually epic to match the cracking sounds emanating from the ice, but there was nothing to see. As I herded her back into the house, she kept looking back, maybe hoping to see small mushroom clouds erupt as the ice vaporized. Instead, we went inside, and waited. The next morning, the pavement sat exposed where the salt had been working all night long.
We all know and have to deal with people that have cold hearts, icy attitudes, and chilly demeanors. But how? For the past several years when confronting a family member that deceived me and demeaned my wife, Kristin, I often tried a full frontal assault instead of a pinch of salt. I felt justified angrily lashing out because I knew I was right, but my words ricocheted away. Therefore, we both remained downright frosty toward each other.
However, Paul says, “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone” (Colossians 4:5-6). And so the thaw in our relationship did not begin until I consciously decided to scatter some positive correction and encouragement into our conversations. And so did Kristin. And so did other relatives.
We all know and have to deal with people that have cold hearts, icy attitudes, and chilly demeanors. But how? For the past several years when confronting a family member that deceived me and demeaned my wife, Kristin, I often tried a full frontal assault instead of a pinch of salt. I felt justified angrily lashing out because I knew I was right, but my words ricocheted away. Therefore, we both remained downright frosty toward each other.
However, Paul says, “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone” (Colossians 4:5-6). And so the thaw in our relationship did not begin until I consciously decided to scatter some positive correction and encouragement into our conversations. And so did Kristin. And so did other relatives.
A single word with a grain of kindness can begin to weaken what appears to be an impenetrable, imposing, and defiant person. The results may not be immediately obvious, and will probably require more salt than we can each sprinkle individually. However, God will make sure that all those grains work together, because “He sends his word and melts them” (Psalm 147:18a).
In the dealings with my family member, I can hear the ice cracking, but that sound - clear, sharp and distinct – is actually the ice melting around my heart.
